Hi folks,
I can't write very much tonight because I just spent the entire day writing an application for a lecturing post at Queen Mary in London. If you are reading this and like this blog and/or my work and know anyone at Queen Mary, please feel free to put in a good word for me! And if you are from Queen Mary and reading this, hello! Yes, I would really like to work at your lovely university!
I did some more reading of the Jani files last night after posting and she is a magnificent creature, having written lots of articles about teenage sexuality, the crisis in public (Brits: state) schools - she was a public (state) school teacher for many years, and about changing the Wisconsin rape laws, which she and her cohort successfully did back in the mid-70s. There are also hundreds and hundreds of letters, to lovers, friends and people in publishing. She desperately wanted her novel/s published, and while she got some interest, they never were and I believe this was a bitter disappointment. At some point, I am going to have to read them.
What I see in her and her efforts reflects back on/to me, and I see how I can learn from many of her mistakes, including a certain informality in her approach to people that I get a sense was premature. I think I do the same thing at times. She is also recklessly flinging herself as a disciple to various writers of books she liked, and it's hard to tell whether she's trying to make contacts for her writing or gain lovers, and from what I can tell, she probably didn't know either half the time.
The thing that comes off all of this though, especially her bravado, is loneliness at core, and this makes me sad. Even though she did find her voice and made her way, she paid a price in keeping herself at arms length from any true companionship. She has lovers who ask her not to call certain numbers or even write certain days because of wives at home. She has minions who help her do her "shit work" (her phrase) and admirers, but I don't sense any companions.
She was also an alcoholic, however, which means that it would have been virtually impossible to create a meaningful bond with anyone. I don't mean by saying this she didn't have friend or people who loved her deeply, because she did. And I know she meant the world to the high-school kids she taught.
I still think I got the best of her that summer on Peaks Island, Maine, and will cherish it always. And always be sad she was not allowed to go off to Hunter College on her theatre scholarship, and instead went to Tuscon State and met and married her first husband, pregnant first then married, way too young, which according to the announcement in the newspaper "surprised their friends and family" - horrified more like. I will find out more of this story when at Darcy's in Minneapolis as she has correspondence between Jani and Russell.
For now, I am indeed toast and must go to bed. More later with pictures and stuff. The good bit of today was eating lobster at a restaurant on the water (OK so I lied I did have one break...). But that will have to wait for tomorrow.
Good night everyone and please wish me luck on the application. I really, really need this job right now and the fit seems perfect.
Welcome to my blog..
"We struggle with dream figures and our blows fall on living faces." Maurice Merleau-Ponty
I am now transitioning into being married again with a new surname (Barclay-Morton). John is transitioning from Canada to NYC and as of June 2014 has a green card. So transition continues, but now from sad to happy, from loss to love...from a sense of alienation to a sense of being at home in the world.
As of September 2013 I started teaching writing as an adjunct professor at Fordham University, which I have discovered I love with an almost irrational passion. While was blessed for the opportunity, after four years of being an adjunct, the lack of pay combined with heavy work load stopped working, so have transferred this teaching passion to private workshops in NYC and working with writers one on one, which I adore. I will die a happy person if I never have to grade an assignment ever again. As of 2018, I also started leading writing retreats to my beloved Orkney Islands. If you ever want two weeks that will restore your soul and give you time and space to write, get in touch. I am leading two retreats this year in July and September.
I worked full time on the book thanks to a successful crowd-funding campaign in May 2014 and completed it at two residencies at Vermont Studio Center and Wisdom House in summer 2015. I have done some revisions and am shopping it around to agents and publishers now, along with a new book recently completed.
I now work full-time as a freelance writer, writing workshop leader, coach, editor and writing retreat leader. Contact me if you are interested in any of these services.
Not sure when transition ends, if it ever does. As the saying goes, the only difference between a sad ending and a happy ending is where you stop rolling the film.
For professional information, publications, etc., go to my linked in profile and website for Barclay Morton Editorial & Design. My Twitter account is @wilhelminapitfa. You can find me on Facebook under my full name Julia Lee Barclay-Morton. More about my grandmothers' book: The Amazing True Imaginary Autobiography of Dick & Jani
In 2017, I launched a website Our Grandmothers, Our Selves, which has stories about many people's grandmothers. Please check it out. You can also contact me through that site.
In May, I directed my newest play, On the edge of/a cure, and have finally updated my publications list, which now includes an award-winning chapbook of my short-story White shoe lady, which you can find on the sidebar. I also have become a certified yoga instructor in the Kripalu lineage. What a year!
And FINALLY, I have created a website, which I hope you will visit, The Unadapted Ones. I will keep this blog site up, since it is a record of over 8 years of my life, but will eventually be blogging more at the website, so if you want to know what I am up to with my writing, teaching, retreats and so on, the site is the place to check (and to subscribe for updates). After eight years I realized, no, I'm never turning into One Thing. So The Unadapted Ones embraces the multiplicity that comprises whomever I am, which seems to always be shifting. That may in fact be reality for everyone, but will speak for myself here. So, do visit there and thanks for coming here, too. Glad to meet you on the journey...
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