I love that.
Got up late, though, and therefore did not meditate before the lovely cleaning lady Leopolda showed up. My friend Julie hires her to come in twice a month, and I never know what to do in these moments, other than smile a lot and offer coffee. So, I went to a meditation meeting instead, which was good, but I still feel the fact I did not do my own meditation, like a tangible lack in my day.
But I met my plane-buddy Rochelle in Central Park - it was her birthday, and in case she's reading - again - Happy Birthday! We walked along the reservoir (see below) and chatted about how we both want to move here from London and hoping we can both work it out. This time I don't have a visa problem, but remember the dilemma well when I first got to London, so wish her well.
|a very full reservoir swamping small trees on the bank|
|East Side from the Central Park reservoir plus gushing geyser thing|
The day was blue sky, cool breeze and sunny, just perfect.
I then went to visit my friend Alyssa and her husband Lynn for another Hurricane-Irene-inspired dinner. Many New Yorkers, told to buy 72 hours of food in case power went out, etc., now have incredibly full refrigerators so are making these gorgeous suppers. Alyssa, too, roasted a chicken (like my friend Louise on Saturday night), made amazing vegetables and then Ivanna came along with three types of ice-cream. I did not leave hungry. We spoke of theater, art, politics and how to make theater and a living in NYC. Always a neat trick.
And I saw Bushwick for the first time. See below photo from inside Alyssa's building.
This signals: (a) smart landlord with Spanish as first and English as second language and (b) this area is not gentrified yet. But, I loved it. The view from the J train, which runs overground on the Williamsburg Bridge is fantastic, and the neighborhood - for those of you from London - has a distinct Dalston feel...as in Dalston circa 2000 not 2011, just to be clear. It is now getting the overspill of hipsters from Williamsburg, so will gentrify, as all neighborhoods do fall to this relentless trend. However, because I've lived in multi-racial areas in London for 8 years, the neighborhood as is does not freak me out. I am looking for where I may end up in real life if I move back here (hint: it won't be the Upper West Side unless a strange occurrence happens wherein (a) I win the lottery or (b) I suddenly discover I am related to someone who is about 95 years old and has a rent-controlled apartment. Any Bukoskis out there?? I could be your long-lost great niece!)
I have also received another intriguing lead that could result in a cheap place to live in Bed-Stuy, but as that is in the feelers stage, will leave out details.
So, it's all been about: how to move back to NYC today. I am feeling more and more strongly every day that this is my path. It's exciting and scary, but to be totally honest, mostly just really fucking exciting. And a relief, because I'm finally taking the actions to make something happen I've wanted to do for ages but talked myself out of over and over for various practical reasons and/or fears.
So, wish me luck. My sense of a higher power keeps telling me this: if you jump, I will catch you. I am finally beginning to listen. Though I am hoping this is not that old Jewish fable wherein the father teaches his son he will catch him when he falls, until one day the boy falls and he does not catch him. He tells him that is the lesson - someone won't always be there to catch you when you fall. I suppose I have to hope my higher power is not that guy. Yikes. I think I'll go with another interpretation of that story: the father is a human being and human beings cannot always be trusted. Yes, that is true. Anyway, with this amazing logic, you can see how I can talk myself out of even the most positive emotions and feelings.
Someday, Dear Lord, Someday, could I just be allowed to feel good for a while? Could you please help me stay off my own back? I'm just sayin'....
Lesson: tomorrow, I meditate first thing no matter what...