Welcome to my blog..


"We struggle with dream figures and our blows fall on living faces." Maurice Merleau-Ponty

When I started this blog in 2011, I was in a time of transition in my life between many identities - that of Artistic Director of a company (Apocryphal Theatre) to independent writer/director/artist/teacher and also between family identity, as I discover a new family that my grandfather's name change at the request of his boss in WWII hid from view - a huge Hungarian-Slovak contingent I met in 2011. Please note in light of this the irony of the name of my recently-disbanded theatre company. This particular transition probably began in the one month period (Dec. 9, 2009-Jan. 7, 2010) in which I received a PhD, my 20 year old cat died on my father's birthday and then my father, who I barely knew, died too. I was with him when he died and nothing has been the same since. This blog is tracing the more conscious elements of this journey and attempt to fill in the blanks. I'm also writing a book about my grandmothers that features too. I'd be delighted if you joined me. (Please note if you are joining mid-route, that I assume knowledge of earlier posts in later posts, so it may be better to start at the beginning for the all singing, all dancing fun-fair ride.) In October 2011, I moved back NYC after living in London for 8 years and separated from my now ex-husband, which means unless you want your life upended entirely don't start a blog called Somewhere in Transition. In November 2011, I adopted a rescue cat named Ugo. He is lovely. As of January 2012, I began teaching an acting class at Hunter College, which is where one of my grandmothers received a scholarship to study acting, but her parents would not let her go. All things come round…I began to think it may be time to stop thinking of my life in transition when in June 2012 my stepfather Tom suddenly died. Now back in the U.S. for a bit, I notice, too, my writing is more overtly political, no longer concerned about being an expat opining about a country not my own. I moved to my own apartment in August 2012 and am a very happy resident of Inwood on the top tip of Manhattan where the skunks and the egrets roam in the last old growth forest on the island.

I am now transitioning into being married again with a new surname (Barclay-Morton). John is transitioning from Canada to NYC and as of June 2014 has a green card. So transition continues, but now from sad to happy, from loss to love...from a sense of alienation to a sense of being at home in the world.

As of September 2013 I started teaching writing (composition and rhetoric) as an adjunct professor at Fordham University, which I have discovered I love with an almost irrational passion. So blessed for the opportunity and hope to find a more permanent job doing same.

I worked full time on the book thanks to a successful crowd-funding campaign in May 2014 and completed it at two residencies at Vermont Studio Center and Wisdom House in summer 2015. I have done some revisions and am shopping it around to agents and publishers now, along with having written a rough draft of a new book and some other projects.

Not sure when transition ends, if it ever does. As the saying goes, the only difference between a sad ending and a happy ending is where you stop rolling the film.

For professional information, publications, etc., go to my linked in profile and website for Barclay Morton Editorial & Design. My Twitter account is @wilhelminapitfa. You can find me on Facebook under my full name Julia Lee Barclay-Morton. More about my grandmothers' book: The Amazing True Imaginary Autobiography of Dick & Jani

Recently, I started a website Our Grandmothers, Our Selves, which has stories about many people's grandmothers. Please check it out. I will be blogging there, too, now.


Friday, May 11, 2012

Watching The Big Lebowski after working my ass off

I've been so busy with teaching and getting various things to various people in regard to applications that I have not had a moment to even write on the blog.  However, I just submitted a third pro forma regarding my work after a week of end of term teaching and saw The Big Lebowski was on television.  The irony of the convergence was not lost on me.

Re-watching it now, it's not quite as funny as it seemed originally but given the state of my brain: fried, it's just fine...and somehow the combination of writing and watching it seems right.

The last piece I wrote about was something I wrote in 2003 at a time when B and I were very much in love.  This permeated the piece, so before attempting to describe the piece, I burst into tears.  I cried for a while and then wrote the pro forma.

I think I wrote the piece around this time of year as well, so that adds to the emotional resonance...

Life is weird that way.

I am waiting for many different people to make decisions that will affect my life and depending on what they are will then need to make some myself...have to remain vague unfortunately but that's the general scenario...

***
watching movie - OK so it is funny...I forgot how funny.  Lines like "oh he's a nihilist" are hard to beat...but there's a surface level to everything - I know it's intentional and clever and all but realize now it only goes so far...but as comedy, yes, it is funny...

***

Got caught up in movie and now back...am feeling kind of raw and drained from the crying and working bit so will end here.  Just kinda wanted to check in.

Teaching my workshop this weekend again down at Brecht Forum, we're almost full up again, which is great.  My friend Vickie's memorial service is on May 13 in London and I wish I could be there, but I can't.

Life's like that when you've been lucky enough to live as many places I have.  I complain about the sense of dislocation but a moment now for gratitude that life has been so large...long may it continue.

Time for tea and bed...


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