If you have been reading my blog for a while, especially a post written last January about '38 years ago today', you will understand that the news today that two little children were stabbed to death, apparently by their Nanny was particularly traumatizing for someone like me to read. It's horrendous no matter who you are, but if you were ever cared for by a babysitter who everyone thought was 'normal' but went loopy and her loopiness involved knives, then it's particularly horrible.
It's moments like this when I realize how lucky I am to be alive. This Nanny, if she is the one who killed the children, also apparently knifed herself and not sure if she'll survive. The mother apparently came upon the children in the bathtub and Nanny on the floor and started screaming. Someone however also heard the Super say "you slit her throat!" so God knows what that means. It's all still unclear, so I'm just reporting what I've read in the NYTimes. But that would make sense to me. This Nanny was 50, Mrs. Levine, my babysitter was in her 40s or maybe 50s. Mrs. Levine was quite unstable, thought I was trying to kill her and a lot of other things besides. However, before she tipped over everyone thought she was a respectable middle aged lady. I knew this so didn't say anything to anyone about how crazy I knew she was. I was certain no one would believe me. I don't know what this situation is or what happened on the Upper West Side in NYC tonight, but whatever it is, it's terrible and two very small children are dead.
I wondered why when I got home I felt I could barely stand up and was suddenly exhausted. Re-reading the article I now know.
I have nothing profound to say about any of this other than that it is horrendous and if anyone tells me this is God's will, I might hurt them. A lot.
Welcome to my blog..
"We struggle with dream figures and our blows fall on living faces." Maurice Merleau-Ponty
I am now transitioning into being married again with a new surname (Barclay-Morton). John is transitioning from Canada to NYC and as of June 2014 has a green card. So transition continues, but now from sad to happy, from loss to love...from a sense of alienation to a sense of being at home in the world.
As of September 2013 I started teaching writing as an adjunct professor at Fordham University, which I have discovered I love with an almost irrational passion. While was blessed for the opportunity, after four years of being an adjunct, the lack of pay combined with heavy work load stopped working, so have transferred this teaching passion to private workshops in NYC and working with writers one on one, which I adore. I will die a happy person if I never have to grade an assignment ever again. As of 2018, I also started leading writing retreats to my beloved Orkney Islands. If you ever want two weeks that will restore your soul and give you time and space to write, get in touch. I am leading two retreats this year in July and September.
I worked full time on the book thanks to a successful crowd-funding campaign in May 2014 and completed it at two residencies at Vermont Studio Center and Wisdom House in summer 2015. I have done some revisions and am shopping it around to agents and publishers now, along with a new book recently completed.
I now work full-time as a freelance writer, writing workshop leader, coach, editor and writing retreat leader. Contact me if you are interested in any of these services.
Not sure when transition ends, if it ever does. As the saying goes, the only difference between a sad ending and a happy ending is where you stop rolling the film.
For professional information, publications, etc., go to my linked in profile and website for Barclay Morton Editorial & Design. My Twitter account is @wilhelminapitfa. You can find me on Facebook under my full name Julia Lee Barclay-Morton. More about my grandmothers' book: The Amazing True Imaginary Autobiography of Dick & Jani
In 2017, I launched a website Our Grandmothers, Our Selves, which has stories about many people's grandmothers. Please check it out. You can also contact me through that site.
In May, I directed my newest play, On the edge of/a cure, and have finally updated my publications list, which now includes an award-winning chapbook of my short-story White shoe lady, which you can find on the sidebar. I also have become a certified yoga instructor in the Kripalu lineage. What a year!
And FINALLY, I have created a website, which I hope you will visit, The Unadapted Ones. I will keep this blog site up, since it is a record of over 8 years of my life, but will eventually be blogging more at the website, so if you want to know what I am up to with my writing, teaching, retreats and so on, the site is the place to check (and to subscribe for updates). After eight years I realized, no, I'm never turning into One Thing. So The Unadapted Ones embraces the multiplicity that comprises whomever I am, which seems to always be shifting. That may in fact be reality for everyone, but will speak for myself here. So, do visit there and thanks for coming here, too. Glad to meet you on the journey...
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