Welcome to my blog..

"We struggle with dream figures and our blows fall on living faces." Maurice Merleau-Ponty

When I started this blog in 2011, I was in a time of transition in my life between many identities - that of Artistic Director of a company (Apocryphal Theatre) to independent writer/director/artist/teacher and also between family identity, as I discover a new family that my grandfather's name change at the request of his boss in WWII hid from view - a huge Hungarian-Slovak contingent I met in 2011. Please note in light of this the irony of the name of my recently-disbanded theatre company. This particular transition probably began in the one month period (Dec. 9, 2009-Jan. 7, 2010) in which I received a PhD, my 20 year old cat died on my father's birthday and then my father, who I barely knew, died too. I was with him when he died and nothing has been the same since. This blog is tracing the more conscious elements of this journey and attempt to fill in the blanks. I'm also writing a book about my grandmothers that features too. I'd be delighted if you joined me. (Please note if you are joining mid-route, that I assume knowledge of earlier posts in later posts, so it may be better to start at the beginning for the all singing, all dancing fun-fair ride.) In October 2011, I moved back NYC after living in London for 8 years and separated from my now ex-husband, which means unless you want your life upended entirely don't start a blog called Somewhere in Transition. In November 2011, I adopted a rescue cat named Ugo. He is lovely. As of January 2012, I began teaching an acting class at Hunter College, which is where one of my grandmothers received a scholarship to study acting, but her parents would not let her go. All things come round…I began to think it may be time to stop thinking of my life in transition when in June 2012 my stepfather Tom suddenly died. Now back in the U.S. for a bit, I notice, too, my writing is more overtly political, no longer concerned about being an expat opining about a country not my own. I moved to my own apartment in August 2012 and am a very happy resident of Inwood on the top tip of Manhattan where the skunks and the egrets roam in the last old growth forest on the island.

I am now transitioning into being married again with a new surname (Barclay-Morton). John is transitioning from Canada to NYC and as of June 2014 has a green card. So transition continues, but now from sad to happy, from loss to love...from a sense of alienation to a sense of being at home in the world.

As of September 2013 I started teaching writing as an adjunct professor at Fordham University, which I have discovered I love with an almost irrational passion. While was blessed for the opportunity, after four years of being an adjunct, the lack of pay combined with heavy work load stopped working, so have transferred this teaching passion to private workshops in NYC and working with writers one on one, which I adore. I will die a happy person if I never have to grade an assignment ever again. As of 2018, I also started leading writing retreats to my beloved Orkney Islands. If you ever want two weeks that will restore your soul and give you time and space to write, get in touch. I am leading two retreats this year in July and September.

I worked full time on the book thanks to a successful crowd-funding campaign in May 2014 and completed it at two residencies at Vermont Studio Center and Wisdom House in summer 2015. I have done some revisions and am shopping it around to agents and publishers now, along with a new book recently completed.

I now work full-time as a freelance writer, writing workshop leader, coach, editor and writing retreat leader. Contact me if you are interested in any of these services.

Not sure when transition ends, if it ever does. As the saying goes, the only difference between a sad ending and a happy ending is where you stop rolling the film.

For professional information, publications, etc., go to my linked in profile and website for Barclay Morton Editorial & Design. My Twitter account is @wilhelminapitfa. You can find me on Facebook under my full name Julia Lee Barclay-Morton. More about my grandmothers' book: The Amazing True Imaginary Autobiography of Dick & Jani

In 2017, I launched a website Our Grandmothers, Our Selves, which has stories about many people's grandmothers. Please check it out. You can also contact me through that site.

In May, I directed my newest play, On the edge of/a cure, and have finally updated my publications list, which now includes an award-winning chapbook of my short-story White shoe lady, which you can find on the sidebar. I also have become a certified yoga instructor in the Kripalu lineage. What a year!

And FINALLY, I have created a website, which I hope you will visit, The Unadapted Ones. I will keep this blog site up, since it is a record of over 8 years of my life, but will eventually be blogging more at the website, so if you want to know what I am up to with my writing, teaching, retreats and so on, the site is the place to check (and to subscribe for updates). After eight years I realized, no, I'm never turning into One Thing. So The Unadapted Ones embraces the multiplicity that comprises whomever I am, which seems to always be shifting. That may in fact be reality for everyone, but will speak for myself here. So, do visit there and thanks for coming here, too. Glad to meet you on the journey...

Friday, November 18, 2011

walking and talking and yoga and Ugo the rescue cat

that was my day.  got up later than I expected so rushed to a meeting with Rik Walter who will be directing the reading of We live in financial times.  Fortunately, he lives up here so was close by.  We discussed possible ways that could work and I experienced the twin feelings I always do when I hand over my work to another director: relief and trepidation.  Not, I hasten to add because he said or did anything to cause concern, but simply because I am a fucking control freak.  And yet I know this is the next right step and I'm really grateful he wants to work on the play.  Plus he has some good ideas already, and that is heartening...and even more importantly, a vocabulary of ways he sees the play that I don't have.  This is the reason to have a separate director, so hooray for that.

Martin Denton told me a couple days ago that I am the second highest selling author on indietheaternow.com, which was a complete surprise.  So, if you want to push me to number one, head on over (link on blog to the right) and buy some plays!  They are super cheap and we, the authors, actually get a percentage, which is novel.

Maybe I will someday think I'm allowed to call myself a writer.  We'll see.

After the meeting with Rik, I took a walk through Inwood Park and met a woman named Celeste who is a healer/shaman type.  I do not understand why I seem to run into so many people like this, but I do.  She complimented my hat and we got to talking.  It was a pleasant conversation, though I must confess that because my father worked for a New Age channeler type person and considered himself a Toltec, my first response to this kind of thing is anxiety and skepticism.  However, I've had my share of pretty intense spiritual experiences, so it always strikes me as hypocritical, this anxiety.  It's all the same stuff with different words attached, I suppose.

She gave me this lovely green stone, which I have put on my three shelf shrine thing.  See what I mean?  Who am I to judge?

I wondered too as Vickie had just died if there was some connection.

I then walked through the woods to see the remaining leaves and the fascinating between place of autumn and winter.  There was a crispness to the air and that inimitable smell of fallen leaves.

This afternoon I spoke with friends and contemplated some different projects but then just took a nap.

Tonight I took a yoga class, which was meant to be restorative but was instead pretty intense.  It felt good though.  It's nice to find out I can do way more than I think.

Returning back, Ugo was out and about and I've been petting him a lot and playing with him.  He even tore around the house in a cat frenzy, which was delightful to see, because it means he's comfortable.  He's now crying because I stopped petting him to write this blog.

I am still deeply sad about Vickie of course and have been hearing from some of her friends and family.  I feel so far away, but the feelings are still there.

So glad I didn't have to teach today.  Instead just kind of collapsing from cumulative tiredness.

I had intended today to revise my short story again and send it out.  This did not happen.  I hope to do so tomorrow morning.  Wish me luck.

I do want to not lose sight of my writing, and am trying to strike the balance between not doing that and  not expecting more of myself than can be reasonably expected.

Some photos from the last week or so, then signing off...

today as leaves begin to fall away - light is amazing I think

Ugo looking outside - because need flash can't get a good face picture yet!

just a week ago...

and again...

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